Washington football team: ranking options for new WFT name
Along with Tuesday’s announcement that the Washington football team will launch their new branding on February 2, comes a distressing caveat: their name will be not being the Red Wolves, which was without a doubt the best of the overused nicknames. The name was popular enough with fans to warrant an explanation (that, like everything else in life, the coolest things are smothered in a vat of legal documents).
The crowdsourced online mockups had the team looking like the product of our 90s New World Order fever dreams. theme song in our cars (maybe I still do it anyway). We’re heading into potentially dark times with the potential options left and, I’m afraid the end result looks like some kind of softened corporate mascot better equipped to sell insurance or big button phones to the elderly.
That said, it’s important to take a look at what’s left of the remaining names that we know of. This list is not, it seems, a final list of names remaining in consideration, but it is as good a starting point as any. If you haven’t had your fill of power rankings yet today, here’s a list of what the WFT should be doing with its new name in a month, ranked from best to worst.
It is the only remaining suitable choice. Hogs or Red Hogs or any iteration of the Hog brand universe would not only be acceptable, but potentially exceptional. Glimpses of the uniform only show us golden stars on the back of a burgundy jersey, which, without leaving any direct clues, contrast sharply with a porcine aesthetic. The stars give us a military / American vibe, and less of a rural hoofed animal vibe. However, this opens the door to some sort of high end pig. In my head, I imagine a golden warthog-like creature, with the stars serving as a kind of militaristic link (maybe the pig is wearing a uniform? Maybe the pig has done a few tours?). Washington doesn’t just stick with the football team, building around their secondary name would be akin to the Browns calling themselves the Dawgs or the Eagles calling themselves the Birds. It’s something a lot of us would do anyway, it’s something that has historical significance, it’s something with built-in merchandising and there’s a lot of potential on the angry pig front. and violent. You could release Pink Floyd’s third best song every week Animals registration. In addition, the announcement is made on Groundhog Day. Coincidence?
2. Washington football team
I think we can live with a permanent WFT scenario. While that would be disappointing and largely a waste of the multi-million dollar branding effort Washington threw in to come up with a new nickname, you could make up for the lack of enthusiasm by nailing the jerseys and possibly coming back. to one of the retro helmet looks; perhaps the script letter in the circle without the offending feathers accompanying the design. While I don’t to like the Washington football team is starting to get comfortable for us. We made our little jokes. We love hearing Scott Hanson say “The Soccer Team” on RedZone. It grows on us like an oversized sweater that our parents gave us a few Christmases ago. The other reason I like WFT in comparison is because some of the other names are just tired or thematically problematic. While none of them are offensive, I think, as you will see, I can argue that they will be tricky under the worst circumstances.
3-6. Brigade, Armada, Defenders, Commanders
While I have no problem attaching you personally to a militarist nickname, we have certainly had ups and downs as a society and country in terms of dealing with military conflicts, military issues and Military-themed things and Washington may want to think long term here. To me, unless you’re West Point, the Naval Academy, the Air Force, or some similar military operation, it’s hard to properly capture the feeling, the pride, and the lore without sounding a bit pandered. To embark on a one-year hi-type contract is certainly an admirable idea, although I would bet that members of our armed forces would more actively appreciate our pushing for better health care programs. and societal acclimatization on their return from service. than for us to name a cool fighting thing after their occupation. What if Washington’s cause ends up being a militaristic nickname with an outside commitment to better mental, physical and emotional care for our troops? Sign me up. If it’s just a cool camouflage hoodie, I think we can all pass the idea on. Once again, this is not to denigrate the military history of our country, its great generals, its brave soldiers and the life that their work has afforded us. I’d be really interested to see what the military community would think of a military-inspired nickname and how they’d like it treated (email us at [email protected]!). Plus, the Patriots kind of got that cornered market, right?
7. The presidents
As I mentioned in my initial post speculating what nicknames might be, whatever your political affiliation, I think we can all agree that in the short term it doesn’t look like we’re in an era. who will produce a universally popular president. The approval ratings of the current and most recent former president are below 50%. The rhetoric has not abated much, if at all. Having a nickname that reflects the incumbent every four years, even indirectly, makes some of the gear virtually unportable for half of your fanbase in alternating cycles.
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